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manifest*

from episode by ben gregory

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about

Ben on manifest* -

‘'manifest*' is about feeling fated to certain situations and lacking control over your own position in life. It looks towards a potential future that is desired but unlikely, focused on a partner and an imagined future family. There are elements of a slightly tragic fixation in there. The narrative retelling is real but it questions itself and cannot commit to painting an impossible future. The attempt was to portray this process of recollection, because people choose how they shape their own memories.’

lyrics

Manifest*

if life is one long goodbye let’s exit french
leave the clothes to hang dry ‘til god knows when
I wanna live in the spirals when you make your eggs
stir around in motion, still
drop a penny to the bottom and wish them well
if time moves backwards, reverse ourselves
through water. it’s over again
a song for our daughter and all of her friends
we’re not the cause, we’re her effect

no light, no rush, no words to define
no translation after you type
but I get confused though the sentiment sticks
it’s unaccountable: some things can’t be martialled into lines
a living, breathing, animated grace
which offers quiet when my thoughts start to race
and turns back around to hide its face
this countenance sheds a layer, unaware

the seeing wasn’t in the act itself misleading
it held you up
still shaking, an apparition or a curse
it’s got you right where it wants
in circles, spinning like a longing thought
of something you wish would come to being
manifested as a light worth leaving on all night

been shaving wrong my whole life
you asked if my father didn’t raise me right
and smiled like a child with a brand-new bike
oh Cassandra, Cassie, Cass
drop a syllable to help her relax
cos loving is what speaking can’t

no lip could move, a quivering worm
an expression that’s hard to discern
but I get uptight when they question our worth
it’s uncountable, some things can’t be martialled into rows
and weighed, labelled, named as strife
I had a vision where you were my wife
and they all laughed, they were probably right
it was monomania, alright

the seeing wasn’t in the act itself misleading
it held you up
still shaking, an apparition or a curse
it’s got you right where it wants
in circles, spinning like a longing thought
of something you wish would come to being
manifested as a light worth leaving on all night

is it bright out? is it bright out?
let the light allow
time, slow down when you’re around
let the light allow
is it bright out? is it bright out?
let the light allow
time, slow down when you’re around
let the light allow

credits

from episode, released April 7, 2023

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